"Pentecostal girl" in my chemistry class gave me a note in today that had 3 bible verses.
• Leviticus 19:28
“Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the Lord.”
• 1 Corinthians 3:16
“Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?”
• 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.”
Ok then… See you in hell!
Leviticus 19:27 reads “You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard.”
- no bowl cuts. I know plenty of people going to hell for this.
Leviticus 11:8, “You shall not eat of their flesh nor touch their carcasses; they are unclean to you.”
- they’re talking about pigs. Soooo, no football. I know about 10 people personally that are going to hell for this.
Leviticus 19:31 reads “Do not turn to mediums or spiritists; do not seek them out to be defiled by them. I am the Lord your God.”
- oh, that’s ok. God is forgiving right?
Leviticus 20:6: “As for the person who turns to mediums and to spiritists, to play the harlot after them, I will also set My face against that person and will cut him off from among his people.”
- well fuck.
Genesis 38:9-10: “Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother’s wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the Lord; so He took his life also.”
- THOU SHALL NOT PULL OUT
Leviticus 19:19 reads, “You are to keep My statutes. You shall not breed together two kinds of your cattle; you shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor wear a garment upon you of two kinds of material mixed together.”
- say goodbye to polyester.
Deuteronomy 23:1 reads (this is the God’s Word translation), “A man whose testicles are crushed or whose penis is cut off may never join the assembly of the Lord.”
- I just can’t…
1 Timothy 2:9 reads “Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments.”
- no braids, no jewelry.
Deuteronomy 25:11-12 reads “If two men, a man and his countryman, are struggling together, and the wife of one comes near to deliver her husband from the hand of the one who is striking him, and puts out her hand and seizes his genitals, then you shall cut off her hand; you shall not show pity.”
- really!? REALLY!? That’s so specific… What the actual
They say I’m ugly. I say I’m sexy, bitch.
They say I’m fat. I say I’m sexy, bitch.
They say I’m stupid. I say I’m sexy, bitch.
They say stop saying that. I say I’m sexy, motherfucker.
I was literally just thinking earlier today “Halloween is like 2-3 weeks away why is everyone already going to costume parties?” only to look at the calendar for the first time a few minutes ago since October started apparently to see that Halloween is in two days.
Why home schooling isn’t always a good thing.
Homeschoolers unite!! *highfive*
If I ever spawn children I’m going to use Tumblr as my Parenting Guide.
If I ever spawn children
Probably my new favorite thing ever.